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MENTAL HEALTH

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"MENTAL ILLNESS ISN'T AN EXCUSE TO BE A SHITTY PERSON." EXCEPT, IT TOTALLY IS


In response to social media posts over the past few days claiming that "having a mental illness isn't an excuse to be a 'shitty person,' 'do bad things..."

How lucky to be so blissfully unaware you are, to be so supportive of mental health issues until somebody displays signs of something more complex than anxiety or depression. You tweet about mental health awareness, but you clearly aren't aware of more complex illnesses and the symptoms. Please, if you're one of those people, take this time to educate yourself and become more understanding coming from me, who has suffered with Psychosis, Borderline Personality Disorder, Mania, breakdowns and Psychotic episodes. 

Mental illness is, in fact a perfectly valid reason (not an excuse,) to behave in bad ways, say bad things, be impulsive, do nasty things, whatever. 
These things usually don't effect people with more common illnesses such as anxiety and depression, however for those of us with more complex illnesses, doing/saying things that other people perceive as 'bad,' or 'shit,' is pretty common and most of the time out of our control. No, it doesn't take away from the fact it was a bad thing they did/said - but they aren't using their mental illness as an 'excuse,' it's a medical, psychological reason. 

For some people who suffer from these issues, things can get very serious, - (you've all heard of killers and other serious criminals who've had a illness such as Schizophrenia.) and there's a reason people like that go into specialised facilities to 'serve their time,' because they are ill. 

For most of us though. it's luckily not quite that serious, personally I've done and said a lot of bad things during mania, psychotic episodes, bad days when my Borderline Personality Disorder signs are showing. I've kicked a police officer in the face, I've told my mum I'll throw bricks at her head, I've hit people, I've tried to fight off doctors to escape from hospitals, I've told people to die, the list is endless. And you know what? That's really fucking scary - because the me that is sitting here right now writing this would never dare do those things, and that's because right now I am stable, healthy and on medication. 
However, at the points in the past I've been at my lowest, not had meds, I did do those horrible things. Yes I regret them, everyday. Yes I've still said sorry. But I did those things because I was unstable and unwell with my mental illness, and that is not a shitty excuse, that is a totally valid medical reason. 

Nor does any of that make me a bad person, it makes me a mentally ill person. And mental illness is sometimes almost impossible to control, some days it can have you feeling like you're not even in your own mind. And y'know what? Most of the time those of us suffering already feel horrible about ourselves, ridden with guilt and self hatred - we don't need the added stigma of ignorant people telling us our illness isn't a reason for our behaviour, because it is. 
You look up online right now the symptoms of some mental health issues: delusions, paranoia, mania, hallucinations, erratic behaviour, compulsiveness, dangerous acts, disordered thinking, flatness, apathy, hostility, irrational thoughts and speech - the list is endless. 

Ignorance is bliss, ey?

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